Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Emotionally Unavailable Men


Just because a man says he wants to get with you, doesn't mean he's ready for a commitment. In fact, it's the opposite. No man just wakes up saying, I want love, commitment and vulnerability and the possible risk of getting hurt or opening up to the wrong woman. Not even a man who says he wants a girlfriend operates this way. The way you see commitment is totally different from the way he sees it. When a man claims to want to be with you, love and commitment and going steady is what he thinks about later. In fact, men think of sex first and the other stuff comes later. A wise quote i once heard was, "men look for sex and find love and women look for love and find sex". In fact, men live in the moment, so you never know if he just broke up with his girl and or is still with his babies mother , still emotionally tied to his ex or just needing some female attention and TLC. So if there's a man in your life and he's telling you he has the hots for you, don't take it as his way of stepping up fora relationship, right away. No matter what he says, love doesn't happen over night. Emotionally unavailable man will tell you all the right things, but his actions will say it all. Don'tbe surprised if he's distant and or shows traits of emotional unavailability, such as

1) texting
2) facebooking
3) Myspacing
4) twitting
5) emailing
6) dropping in and out of your life when he pleases
7) actions contradicting words, changing of behavior and routines
8) breaking up with old girlfriend, getting back together
9) relationship statuses on facebook changing frequently

A man does not dream of his dream girl the way a woman dreams of her dream guy. He has to grow into wanting and desiring the whole love package.

While women have been thinking about love all her life, she has had a head start, that a man has to catch up to. Be patient ladies. A man in love is nothing to play with. It is the most intense, beautiful thing you could ever imagine. If he's acting as if he's head over hills too soon, it's lust and might be a sign that he is emotionally unavailable. Remember ladies, most of the guys you meet are emotionally unavailable at first, so understand that intense closeness is something he has to grow into. No matter what he says, love does not happen over night and men don't operate that way. Forget his words and believe his actions.

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