Know what you want! & Love thy self
August 22, 2010
I recently read an inquiry about how men don’t commit, unless they feel they can’t do better or are afraid of loosing you. I also read that men prefer you to be bald and hairless in certain areas. Well, I’m here to tell you this, screw him and what he thinks. For every woman , there’s a mirror to match in a man. Know who you are, and love thy self. When you love yourself, everything else will fall into place. Know what you want in a man, and you will never have to worry about being dogged by one, because you won’t be taking scraps. Whenever you attract a man who doesn’t accept you or like something about you, it’s because it’s something within yourself that you don’t accept. KNOW THY SELF, EMBRACE THY SELF, AND KNOW WHAT YOU WANT. Everything will fall into place from there on.
In the words of Dave Chapelle, “women are comparing themselves against magazines and celebrities and the more they look at the pictures, the uglier and fatter they feel and when a woman doesn’t know she’s beautiful, well then hell, we all suffer, because then she will set the bar too low”. Men know this secret, but they will tell you anything to talk you out of truly loving yourself so that they can continue to get your panties and waste your time. Know your beauty, because it’s best for a man. He just doesn’t know it yet, so don’t change, don’t frail, do you. Stop being desperate and know that, “one man’s lost is another man’s treasure”
DO NOT EVER ALLOW A MAN TO COMPARE YOU WITH ANOTHER WOMAN, AND OR MAKE YOU SECOND GUESS YOURSELF. YOU’RE THE BEST. KNOW THAT. A MAN DOES NOT DEFINE YOU, GOD DOES!
MEN LIKE HAPPY, VIBRANT WOMEN!
Posted by: flygyrl on: August 22, 2010
Men like to have fun, they are fun creatures. They enjoy being childlike, immature, goofy, free, and spontaneous.
Men like happy, vibrant women. If you find yourself being a complainer, hater, sad, dry personality type, then you’re in big trouble. Men don’t want that! They want someone who can make them laugh, someone they can laugh with. They want a woman who is free to go, and not over analyzing every second. They like women with energy. If you are sad, unhappy, depressed , negative and or etc, you could be pushing him away. Men like women that they can have fun with. Pick up the pace, speed it up, crank the music up, let your hair down, roll the windows down and enjoy life, because men do like vibrance.
Get Happy !! )
Men will not uplift you, so don’t wait for it
Posted by: flygyrl on: August 22, 2010
Unless a man is sent by God as your prince charming or unless he’s a friend used as a vessel to uplift you, he won’t sweety, so don’t wait for it. Men who have a special calling in your life to uplift you will do so. Men who are in your life for other causes will not uplift you. Think about how many times a guy secretly gave you a compliment that sounded like crap and made you want to puke afterwards? How often has a man invalidated your confidence? How man times have you made yourself look awesome for a man, only for him not to notice or insult you? If you’re waiting for a man to uplift your confidence and or affirm you, don’t waste your time. You might as well do it yourself. Uplift yourself, encourage yourself. Men know who they are, in fact, men like who they are. They don’t fish for compliments, like women do. They may do little extra stuff to get the lady’s attention, but they know when they look good! They rarely seek your approval. With a man,when he’s looking good, he knows it, and when you notice it, it’s like confirmation for him. They will never seek you to validate them, before they first validate themselves. The difference with women is, she has no confidence until a man gives it to her. Ladies, you have to know who you are, and never allow a man nor his actions to validate who you are, because the only time that happens is when you don’t know who you are. So know your talents, strengths, and greatness. When a man sees that you want his approval, he’ll do the opposite or switch it up at any given time, because now he’s in control, so just love and uplift yourself, they do it! I mean, you can’t put all your trust in man. In addition to that, a man may have a tendency to throw darts at you here and there, why, because they don’t like having the pressure of always uplifting your confidence, you do it for a change!
I always notice that anytime, I seek a man’s compliments, I give up my power. Love and compliment yourself and he will do the opposite of hating, which is, love what you’re all about.
A Man’s Testosterone Level
Posted by: flygyrl on: August 22, 2010
A brief conversation with student from a physiological psychology class, written by flygyrl:
"I like that point you made, this may be a reason why i notice that men define themselves by their penis size, and also their sperm count. Very subtle, huh? I see why it happens that way now, their hormones are produced in their testicles. You also said that women produce their hormone levels through their ovaries. I wonder if that is why a hormone, Oxytocin is released when a woman has sexual intercourse, gives birth and breast feeds. I also wonder if that is why she is so nurturing and shows her love through sexual attachments, when they do occur. It’s funny how you say that, men have less estrogen levels than women, thus producing more aggressive behaviors, determined by testosterone. I have been listening to men claim that, women are more aggressive than men these days. I think that’s a problem when you have a hormone floating around in your system that a woman has less of that produces aggression and she can be more aggressive than you.
The definition of Testosterone (wikipedia):
In men, testosterone plays a key role in the development of male reproductive tissues such as the testis and prostate as well as promoting secondary sexual characteristics such as increased muscle and bone mass and hair growth. In addition, testosterone is essential for health and well-being as well as the prevention of osteoporosis.
Now you see, men have a hormone in their body that only defines them as a man. Men have no reason to blame a woman for being more aggressive than he is today in society, unless of course, he has yet to do a ball check, which is exactly where the hormone testosterone is produced. LET’S DO A HAND CHECK FELLA’S. LOL
When a MAN Says Stop!!
Posted by: flygyrl on: August 21, 2010
Men always say, women are emotional, they talk too much, think too much, they complain too much and don’t give it up fast enough, and rarely enough. Men also hate when we consult our girlfriends for advice, swearing we don’t know squat! lol Well I’m here to tell you that what a man ask you to stop, it may not always be what’s best for him, but it could be best for you. Try an experiment. Without a woman’s words, men could never figure us out. Stop talking and see how much power you have. He won’t know rather he should go left or right. You will be able to wrap him around your fingers like what! Men say we think too much. try to stop thinking and see how fast he questions why you aren’t thinking about him enough, power. Stop consulting your girlfriends, and seek their advice and see just how screwed up you’ll be afterwards. They will talk to you like a man, just to keep you guessing. Men secretly hate for women to figured them out, it’s against their oath and who wants their cards pulled. "When women come together and figure them out, they hate that, so they say things like, why consult women? they don’t know anything". Stop complaining and just sigh for a change, or when he asks what’s wrong, simply reply with, “nothing”, or “thanks a lot”, lol. See how much power you will have. Be unwise and give it up too soon if you want to, and guess what! he will not respect you; men only respect women that make them wait. Give it up more frequently, even when he’s undeserving and guess what, you become a sex object, which only he can associate with. Try to turn off the emotions, be head strong and overly logical and guess what, then he can’t break you down, break your confidence or through you off. Listen to his emotional complaints about women and his pleas for you to stop, do it and see how much power you will have. Men actually enjoy this upper hand they have over you, sometimes they just can’t deal with the trade.
Pet Names (but he calls me sweetheart)
Posted by: flygyrl on: August 20, 2010
But he calls me Baby, babes, sweetheart, love, honey, boo, all the nicknames, etc, he must be my baby beau too!
Guys will call you pet names, to try to ease their way into your life. If a guy likes you, instead of doing the hard work, he’ll sometimes call you baby,sweetheart, etc because it’s easier. For one, it paralyzes you,puts your guard down, and two, it’s easy for him to ease his way into your life , without doing the hard work, and last but not least, it gives the impression of closeness.
Okay, stop falling for that! I don’t care if he calls you sweetie, sweetheart, baby, babes, boo pop, love, or whatever, if you have no rapport with him, and you have not been together for a while or do not have some strong connection , that surpasses first names, don’t go for the okie doke. A man who hasn’t built rapport with you will only call you pet names, because it sounds like you’re all close and what not. It’s game. If you have not built a connection, chances are, he calls every girl that and he’s running game, to try to make you believe that you are closer with him than you really are. Pet names stem from history. Don’t fall for this trick. If you are his baby and you have built a foundation, then his pet name for you is legit, otherwise watch out, because it’s game. Don’t fall for the pet names, unless of course, it makes sense. Ain’t nothing wrong with liking it, heck, we all like it but just don’t fall for the depth of the meaning behind the pet name too soon.
Remember that, love at first sight is rare, and even then, love takes time. Connections always take time. Nothing happens overnight. Don’t believe the hype. When a man comes on too strong, it’s game. Men do not and rarely do they fall fast, and quick. They are timed creatures, so if he’s acting like he’s close to you and it’s only been a month or two, please,that’s how you know it’s game. Men take their time, unless of course, he’s desperate.
I met a guy on a Thursday once, and he tried to call me baby and sweetheart, by Friday, lol when i asked him to stop because he didn’t know me that well, he replied with, why can’t i call you that? it was game that I called him out on.
Peace and I’m outie.
So Should You Change for a Man ?
Posted by: flygyrl on: August 18, 2010
Since my last discussion of Black Men against Black women, it got a little steamy. What a touchy subject, but I have to now switch it up, address something else. So Should you change for a man? I ask first, who are you? Do you know? If you know who you are, accept who you are and love who you are, you will never feel the need to change, alter or create new habits just for a man. A man sometimes thinks he has the ability and power to change and mold a woman into what he wants her to be. I call it the, “alter effect”. A friend brought something to my attention today. She said, “why is it that men have an X and Y chromosome, yet they don’t understand us, and they share one of our chromosomes”. Wrong, it’s the other way around. Because men do share one of our chromosomes and they are female first, before created into a male sex, they do understand much more about women than we understand about men. I think men do understand many things about women, the difference is, they don’t accept what they receive a lot of times, and try to alter what is natural, by giving negative connotations to words associated with women, such as “emotional”. They also try to talk you out of certain habits, that may be natural. There’s a difference between understanding and agreeing. So should you alter yourself for them? No. The only time you should change yourself, is if it is best for you and only you. You should never change your style for any man. Be yourself and if he doesn’t like it, Ta hell with him! You are who you are, why should it change just because you met him. What he may not like, another man will. One man’s lost is another man’s treasure. Be someone else’s treasure and demand that respect. Men never change who they are for a relationship, they are “as is” merchandise. They look at things like this, “either you want to purchase or not”. Be as is merchandise and advertise yourself the way you are, and if he likes it, he’ll flock to it, if not ta hell with him. Men sometimes think that they have the power to validate a woman’s worth, no he doesn’t , only GOD can do that. Do not allow a man to validate you as worthy or unworhty. DO NOT CHANGE FOR A MAN!
BLACK MEN AGAINST BLACK WOMEN
Posted by: flygyrl on: August 13, 2010
Due to slavery and hardships the Black man has experienced in society, he is the most corrupted of all the genders within all the races . The Black woman isn’t even as corrupted mentally as he is. The White man has done nothing but try to keep the Black man down, so that he can’t be strong for his woman, as the head should be. In the slavery days, the Black man was torn from his family, emasculated, lynched, and in some cases, lynched with his penis cut off and stuffed in his mouth. The Black man was even called a boy by his slave master and was completely treated like a biyatch. They even beat the slave man in front of his woman, so that the slave women would believe that he was too weak to protect her. This created the term used today, “strong Black woman”. She had to take care of him, guide him and hold it down when his confidence and manhood was broken and when the slave man was torn from his family and moved from plantation to plantation, according to the White man’s plan. As the Black man was broken down constantly, they forgot one thing, to break the Black woman down, because their goal was to make her so strong that she would rule over her man, thus triggering the biyatch effect in him, which emasculated him, just as his slave master and society once did him. Due to the White man f****** the Black man over, he is lost as to what it means to be a man, the head, the provider. His syndrome, passed down from generation to generation, has only strengthened the women around him, thus forcing her to be the man and woman in many cases, i.e., in her household. Also during the slavery days, the White man was so fearful and insecure, that instead of just emasculating the Black man, he also warned him not to go near his woman. He was jealous of the beautiful dark skin, confidence, kingliness, nice body and long pea cock the Black man possessed , that could easily be associated with masculinity. Although the Black man never desired the White woman, the White man was terrified because of his own attraction to the beautiful, sexy Black woman, which he raped . He projected his own desires for the Black woman, onto the Black man, thinking that, he must feel the same for my woman. The Black man was opposite and attractive, therefore he warned his woman, “stay away from those n***** boys”. Although there may have been a curiosity on the White woman’s part, there wasn’t anything to worry about, horrifically. Due to the fear of the white man, the term “forbidden fruit” was created. Due to the White woman being forbidden, she yearned for the Black man even more. The Black man was so insecure and torn from who he truly was, similar to the way Simba was torn from being King in the lion king, which is a KING man, every now and again, he would be curious of trying something that made him feel equal to his slave master, rather than meant, going chicken fighting, having a higher slave position, like keeping the n***** in check or house n***** positions, or maybe even sex with a white girl, although this desire was rare. Anytime a slave man was perceived as confident and or free, he was oppressed and belittled and undermined, so that he would be put back in place. What message does this send to his mind frame? That he is constantly invalidated and will need to do anything it takes to validate him self. Once slavery ended and this world became more equal, and integrated, interracial dating became more popular. Black men have done any and everything to try to redeem themselves from being over powered and oppressed. Rather that means, leaving their families, abusing their women, being mannish, rapping vulgar lyrics towards their Black women, fucking white girls, being disrespectful , irresponsible, etc. Black men are so insecure within in themselves , that they actually think that being able to have any woman they want now, is making them of equal status in society. In fact, the honorable Elijah Mohammad explained in the 1960′s that White people were going to go through a repentance stage of 60 years, in which more equality would be seen , i.e., Obama for presidency, black people in higher economical positions, etc. and more White people will render themselves to Blacks. He also discussed the last trick of the white man, is his promotion of his woman to the Black man, not all but some will fall for the trick. It’s a trick to keep the Black race torn apart, and keep the black man against his woman, his queen. In addition to that, this also saves them from the ozone layer and their time, which is coming to an end on this earth, as more couples mix. Surely you didn’t think that after all that oppression, White people are kissing our butts, befriending us, and our men for no reason, right. No, by the turn of the century, the world will be Black again. It’s GOD’s plan, consult the creator, i did. Of course, the uneducated Black man wouldn’t know that. Black men love their Black women, but they are angry because they do not understand the system of what i just explained. They don’t understand the root. They would rather play the victim and not try to understand their place and how their experience has led to their own harsh behaviors. Instead of turning to GOD, or religious leaders and groups that can teach them what it means to be Black, in many cases, some Black men who aren’t rational of course, have decided that, the best way to get back at the world, their women and the White man is by, fucking their women, to get back at the White man for being fucked over in society and in life. This was confirmed by some Black men. It’s only a pay back thing and it’s very destructive behavior. Some of these men hate themselves, and they are mad at their women and White women. When they, pay back, they are only sabotaging themselves, but too stupid to realize it. BLack men, some, not all haven’t realized this domino effect yet, and they are so hateful towards their own women. Black men need to stop tearing their women down!! and realize what the root is and get to it. Stop saying we’re this and that, and look within your own selves. Although society has done you wrong, you have become your own worst enemy in so many ways. You can be irresponsible, lazy, uneducated ,weak acting hateful, mannish and angry. It’s disgusting. You have been taught to hate yourself and your people, and out of all races and genders, you are the only one’s that have no knowledge of who you really are. Black women know, that’s why they’re so loyal. Out of all the races, YOU Black men ARE THE ONLY ONE’S THAT DEGRADE YOUR OWN WOMEN, IN SONGS, MUSIC, MOVIES, MEDIA AND IN LIFE. At no point, should a Black man ever put down his Black Queen, ever! I don’t want to hear you use words, like bitch, or hoe that are considered anonymous with being a woman. It makes no sense to act as if she is not perfectly designed for you. It makes no sense to bash, what you attracted into your life. Be a man, and be responsible of your own choices. For every woman you bash, there’s a man to match. Stop putting your women down and stop hating yourself so much. and please, let’s get rid of the “y’all factor”. y’all Black women this, y’all Black women that! Look within yourself, and at your own faults. Cast the first stone, if you’re completely innocent. In the words of a woman’s article, “GOD made the Black woman in his image and loves her, so what makes you think you can invalidate her existence, as a mortal being”. Black women embody every trait and every characteristic that every woman has on earth. They all come from us, we are the first people. STOP putting down your mother, sister, aunts and daughters. Stop subliminally slapping us in the face! Stop being against yourself , since we are mirror images of one another. And please stop with these dumb azz cliché’s , “i love black women”, “strong Black women”. We are so sick n tired of hearing these terms as if it’s abnormal or something. I mean, you’re supposed to love Black women, what else? I never heard of a cat going up to another cat and in their cat language say, ” I love felines”. Duh, of course you love us, as you should, but when men start saying it to get some sort of reward or cookie for it, something is wrong. You are supposed to love your own kind, your own women. A woman should be strong, what else would she be if not strong, weak? My question is, so the women won’t stand alone, where the strong BLACK MEN???? And brotha’s, please stop labeling us incorrectly, i.e., Angry Black woman. I’ve haven’t met too many of those, but I have met hurt Black women, who need and deserve to be loved. I met Black women who have been dogged and abandoned by their Black men, even church going brotha’s. We’re tired of waiting, so love us first, and be our covenant. We’re tired of you allowing the devil to use you against us and your own race of people. A man of GOD never dips easy. He sticks with his woman and loves and cherishes her like christ loved the church. When will this stupidity end. We must stick together and love one another in order to rise. You cannot rise without your people, so Black men, get off the bullshit. And down low brotha’s , we know who you are, we just don’t say it to your face, please stop trying to play like you hate your own women, because you’re gay. It’s a COVER UP, THERE’S NOTHING WRONG WITH US. COME OUT THE CLOSET.
No woman on earth holds a candle to the Black woman. We are the shit! 36O degrees around, in every way possible. From our brains, swag, soul, flavor, strength to everything else, you name it. WE ARE THE SEXIEST. Although majority Black men are with Black women, a handful have bad issues towards being against their own women, and their rubbing off. FIND A GOOD BLACK WOMAN AND STICK TO HER. LEAVE THE HOOCHIES ALONE AND FIX YOUR OWN PROBLEMS, BE A MAN AND A MAN OF GOD, AND THERE YOU WILL FIND YOUR DREAM COME TRUE, YOUR QUEEN! When you become a real man to her, a man of integrity, the drama and problems will cease. She will be easy, loving and will yield to your presence. I know I yield to real man! boo yow